Red Screes

In the AM. About seven. The sound of hooves cantering along tarmac brought me out of what was my first decent night’s sleep in quite some time. ‘A horse.’ I said aloud smiling, still drowsy, sounding six years old. I turned, ducked under the rainmaster silver venetian blinds and looked out of the window behindContinue reading “Red Screes”

Claife Heights

My eyes struggled adjusting to the bright florescent lighting reflecting off the immaculate floor tiles in the showroom. I sat on a perfectly Feng Shui positioned leather couch accompanied by a metal legged glass top table. The receptionist, a slim, leggy brunette twenty something peered over the top of her smoothed square framed glasses fromContinue reading “Claife Heights”

Arnside part ii

I was back in my car speeding along a B-road heading back toward the office. I knew what was coming. I kept repeating to myself that everything was going to be fine. Everything’s always fine. Not that my shaking left hand, aching jaw and nauseating swell in my ever-deepening stomach bought into my forced positivity.Continue reading “Arnside part ii”

Arnside

Staying true to the form of the last twelve months, February appeared to offer a little light in the distance only to reveal its culmination was an illusion. I was on the coast. Early as usual. Too early. Wanting to make a good impression, not that the pay cheques noticed. The temperatures had plummeted unexpectedly;Continue reading “Arnside”

Traum-a

‘…flight to Las Vegas is now boarding. Please have your boarding passes and passports ready.’ Announced the tannoy. I put down my copy of “Dante’s Inferno” and grabbed my bag. ‘Mr Underhill?’ Called out a tall, burly airport security officer with piercing grey eyes. ‘Yes?’ ‘You need to come with us.’ Another airport security officerContinue reading “Traum-a”

Dodgson Wood

I stood in line at the petrol station trying in vain to release my wallet from the right pocket of my slim fit trousers using only my left hand, out of fear my right was covered in covid-19 after using the petrol pump. Not being able to pull off this feat by the time IContinue reading “Dodgson Wood”

The Langdales via Stickle Tarn.

Harrison Stickle – 2415ft. Pike ‘o Stickle – 2323ft. It was the last house of the day, halfway through my trial week as an estate agent photographer. I already knew I wouldn’t last. The hours were longer than originally stated, there was no pay for overtime, despite inevitable overtime most evenings and the distances coveredContinue reading “The Langdales via Stickle Tarn.”

Helm Crag aka The Lion and the Lamb aka The 90’s Joe Pesci of Mountains. (The last one I made up).

Alt: 1299 ft. The text came through at 6:15 on the Friday evening, ‘Jack, please call me when you can. Cheers, John.’ I was staring up at Helm Crag aka ‘The Lion and the Lamb’ from the village of Grasmere walking back to my car after paying more than I like for a couple ofContinue reading “Helm Crag aka The Lion and the Lamb aka The 90’s Joe Pesci of Mountains. (The last one I made up).”

Latterbarrow

I looked out the skylight of my bedroom. The leaves on the grand oaks were yet to begin turning but wouldn’t be able to hold out for much longer. A blue hue rose from out the ground in the field opposite, suggesting Hell had in fact frozen over. I sighed. Thirty-six and back home livingContinue reading “Latterbarrow”