The Coffin Trail

16:00 ‘Sar…Faye…’ ‘Were you about to call me Sarah?’ ‘What? No.’ ‘Who is she?’ She shouted theatrically, laughing. ‘What you on about? I said Faye.’ ‘It’s ok don’t get tetchy I’m only joking around. Anyway, you seem a little distracted and sound like you don’t want to chat, so I’ll let you go. Call meContinue reading “The Coffin Trail”

High Dam Tarn

It was quiet. Even the jackdaws were conscious of their squawks. The country was both in it together, and alone. In the States the ill-informed, brainwashed and plain old racist wreaked havoc resulting in murder. If Covid-19 exposed the fragility of the human body, then Trump and his cronies certainly exposed the fragility of theContinue reading “High Dam Tarn”

Whinlatter Forest

‘Underhill! Can you not read full sentences?’ ‘I can sir.’ ‘Then why is it you’ve just missed a chunk of that sentence out?’ ‘I don’t know sir.’ ‘Don’t know? Maybe you have selective reading? Is that it?’ ‘No sir.’ ‘Can you see the words in brackets?’ ‘Yes sir.’ ‘Then I repeat, why did you notContinue reading “Whinlatter Forest”

Fell Foot

Despite being told not to have any decorations up until the photographer had been, the proprietor of this two-up two-down in Morecambe looked like she’d let Santa come all over her walls. ‘We need a little cheer this year. I know I was told to leave the house bare but…you know…the kids.’ Explained the motherContinue reading “Fell Foot”

Dollywaggon Pike

2815ft. Bobby finally made the jump from the big smoke to back home. Eighteen years away. He’d been full of the joys of spring leading up to the move but fell flat once he’d landed. I told him he’d be alright. It’d just take a few days. Turns out I was right; well maybe itContinue reading “Dollywaggon Pike”

Haystacks

1958ft. An apocalyptic orange dawn seeped through the rungs of the curtains that hadn’t been attached to the rail. I automatically thought ‘Bladerunner’. Too many movies, that’s my problem. Or so I’m told. My eyes followed the sound of a grunt, stopping at the root cause; Percy, Faye’s pug. He was sat on top ofContinue reading “Haystacks”

Coniston Old Man

2634ft. Jenny’s grandad, Bill, died ten days earlier. The funeral was a washout. He didn’t want a fuss and didn’t get one. He’d asked Jenny if she would scatter his ashes from the top of Coniston Old Man, a mountain he climbed over and over throughout the years; not out of favouritism, but convenience. TheContinue reading “Coniston Old Man”

Pike ‘O Blisco

2312ft. I was admiring the framed ‘Alien’ poster on some geezer’s living room wall. The place screamed bachelor pad. He had an excessive number of guitars and a DVD collection that didn’t do a lot for me. He kept the place tidy, which is more than you can say for the majority of the housesContinue reading “Pike ‘O Blisco”

Dodgson Wood

I stood in line at the petrol station trying in vain to release my wallet from the right pocket of my slim fit trousers using only my left hand, out of fear my right was covered in covid-19 after using the petrol pump. Not being able to pull off this feat by the time IContinue reading “Dodgson Wood”

The Langdales via Stickle Tarn.

Harrison Stickle – 2415ft. Pike ‘o Stickle – 2323ft. It was the last house of the day, halfway through my trial week as an estate agent photographer. I already knew I wouldn’t last. The hours were longer than originally stated, there was no pay for overtime, despite inevitable overtime most evenings and the distances coveredContinue reading “The Langdales via Stickle Tarn.”